The Immensely Tragic Loss of a Truly Great Treasure
Posted 23 March 2023. Small edits 23 May 2023.
The piercing depth of the pain is beyond words...
I lost a truly wonderful and deeply treasured friend and confidant on my property this week. And not just me - the world did as well. Evie was a remarkable young woman with a keen mind, broad refined skills, tenacious grit, total honesty, very clever sense of humor and zest for fun, and absolutely superb civility in every regard. She made life thoroughly sweet and effortless, and always both tangibly and spiritually better - she was utterly fulfilling company with not just zero maintenance, but rather always left the turf better than she found it. She was equal to the finest human beings I've ever had the immense pleasure of sharing time with. And if spirits like hers dominated our globe, residents from every space faring planet throughout our galaxy would make the daunting journey to Planet Earth to learn how we achieved such a stunningly beautiful civilization. And that still only scratches the surface of the great treasure of Evie.
But life was unrelentingly difficult for her, with precious little material opportunity to build upon, many shallow or troubled hearts all around, and even overt gratuitous hostilities. This is a terribly difficult country for pure hearts to survive within, and nearly impossible for those with minimal material resources or shelter. And Evie was not the kind of person who could abandon her humanity in the face of serious hardship, so her struggles were amplified by that which made her so precious.
So, as best I can discern, when every breath became so painful that the next could not be born, she did what so many pure hearts do to quench the agony.
We just lost an absolute jewell, and I personally lost a large portion of my heart. This will be piercingly painful for a very long time. And life is forever different now.
I ask everyone to respect the profound plight of those who lose everything due to train wreck class relationships, disease, war related terrors, destruction, and displacement, innocent mistakes, plain old bad luck, or any other cause. Rebuilding a life in this country is incredibly difficult unless quite special and timely skills can be leveraged, and even then it's no cake walk. Frankly, if Evie couldn't do it, it's inconceivable to me that any mortal human being could sans some quite special leverage.
Kudos to many, including local bureaucracies who demonstrated strongly genuine heart and care as they provided both tangible and spiritual help in very generous proportion. In my experience they were aces, truly.
Yet none of us managed to sufficiently relieve the pain, nor were we able to provide a solid and enduring foundation for her to build upon. It's as if the sorrow is in the water, an American sickness of culture. We compete, posture, hope to win in every little maneuver at the expense of another, all in pursuit of goals so shallow that we should be humiliated with ourselves. And frankly we don't seem to like each other much. And wealth is coveted to such a degree that those who have little have almost no chance to build foundations even for themselves, much less a family. It's not like this everywhere, and as I often tell guests, I'm exhausted with America.
This was a land of great promise and foundation, wise in recognizing the priceless treasures of liberty, justice, civility, and ethical pursuit of opportunity, fulfillment, and happiness. Government was tiny yet powerful in wisdom. Liberty and civility gave people a chance to forge fulfilling lives for themsleves. Imperfectly of course. But usually well, and improving with time.
But look at us now - bickering endlessly over anything and everything, treating others disrespectfully and with little empathy and understanding, and even killing each other in such numbers that disease seems to be fading as our principle enemy. The halls of high government seem like poster children for this sickness. But we are its foundation - we created it and we almost insist that our leaders embrace it, as many eagerly do for very selfish reasons.
And it's far, far beyond embarrassing - it's bloody dangerous. We seem to be following the path of the demise of Easter Iland with such accuracy that it should be obvious and alarming to everyone, yet we continue to spiral down.
And in great measure it just cost the life of a most beautiful human being. Shame on us.
Never again. Please, never again. Let's all do what we must to create a functional civilization which actually rewards pure hearts rather than crushes them. One we can all say we're profoundly proud to have forged and nurtured. Abandon superficial and meaningless material goals, develop ever keener empathy, and tolerate no injustice or hostility in any quarter. All of us, together. Because this is not something which can be delegated - no 'Department of Advanced Civility' can accomplish this for us any more than a 'Department of Urinary Tasks' can trek to a toilet to pee for us. Some might promise so in a quest for votes. Elect wise and honest leaders instead, then embrace the hard effort only we can exert, with tenacious sincerity, determination, and civility.
I believe I understood some elements of her pain, but I can't know my dear friends thoughts near the end. I desperately wish she could still speak about our mutual problems and dysfunction, because ultimately she was the overwhelming expert in the matter. And not merely in the mechanics of it, but with a profound wisdom of it - a wisdom which can only come from living the nightmare. So it might be best to ignore my interpretations in favor of a far wiser voice from the grave. You didn't know her, but ultimately you don't need to. You do know pain. And most people have experienced times when every breath was literally physically painful. We strive to put them in the past, as in some measure we must. But occasionally we must revisit them because this pain is inescapable for many around us, and as a simple matter of fidelity of empathy we must occasionally feel it too. And most importantly, listen to the voices of those in pain, even after death. Because we owe it to them and to ourselves. And ultimately it's our only route to survival.
Evie I miss you so deeply and so painfully, and always will. Irreplaceable profound treasure is lost. And I can never bid you farewell - you will be in my heart forever, and I will do my best to honor your life and precious gifts - as soon as I can dry my eyes and find enough strength to forge forward. And I will relate stories of your gorgeous heart with total respect for anyone who's wise enough to wish to hear them.
And if I manage to succeed with v2.0, the gleaming ship will, with intense pride, display its beautiful name "Clipper Evie Mae" for all to see and love forever.
But the far greater tribute would be a healthy American culture. Please everyone, let's create that. For Evie. In our loving eternal memory of a pinnacle treasure so tragically lost.
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